Beginning

 

A new beginning

A fresh start

...

More like the ending of an old life and the living of a new life I don't understand

Almost being born again except with the old body

Almost like going on a trip without a map

-

I've always hated the word "retired", but I think that's because it's been burdened with untruths, like leisure, free time, freedom, avarice, excess, greed; as well as age, decline, suffering, disability, uselessness, poverty, death (as in, "He couldn't handle retirement. He died a couple years later.").

There is no normal retirement. Most of us can't sit on the porch and think while drinking coffee because 1. we don't have a porch; 2. we're not supposed to drink coffee; 3. it's too cold; 4. it's too hot; 5. the projects are calling us back inside.

I officially retired a few years ago, but funds were a little tight, so I got a parttime job. My husband had been looking forward to retiring for years and once his date was set to leave the company, mine was as well. He wanted me to retire with him. He felt bad that I had to work and he didn't. 

So, I officially retired with him. 

This first week of beginnings has been strange. There are so many projects that have waited for us that we have driven ourselves crazy trying to get them all done in a couple days. 

Not possible.

I'd like to say, we've got plenty of time, but we know that might not be true. I'd like to say we are on an extended vacation, but that's not true either. 

I think there needs to be a new name for retirement. Let's leave it open, allow it to be, like moving or getting a new job or having a baby or getting married or getting fired or ... you know, life changes. 

Any ideas?

(Yes, indeed, I will be blogging more!)

Timing

They say, "Timing is everything," and I think they're right.

Timing created so much stress in my life a few months ago that my head just about exploded.

Timing brought me to a place where I became dependent on a new friend to navigate my way - and he became my husband.

Timing got me that job at Hobby Lobby.

Timing got me that job at the library - the right boss, the right skills, the right attitude, the right place, the right time.

Timing took me to a place where I could help that person.

Timing let me see the two bluejays run the crow off their nest. 

Timing allowed me to witness one of my cats leading a deer to water during the drought last summer.

Because of timing I:

- saw that falcon

- prayed with someone who needed it

- helped that patron find a Bible resource

- was kept safe from an accident.

But the truth lies beneath. Timing is God. God is in control of timing. The more I place my trust in God (okay, God, this thing is happening and I don't know what to do, so give me strength and awareness to trust You with it) the more I see His perfect timing. 

Cold

 

Cold

Stone cold

Cold as ice

When hell freezes over

Record temperatures

Battery dead

Pipes frozen

Electricity off

Buying gallons of water to exist

Calling off work for snowed in lane

Snowed in driveway

Snowed in workplace

Canceled plans

Church

School

Closed stores

Doors

Windows

Plastic up

Spare rooms locked

Books out

Crafting

Writing

Old movies playing

Soup

Bread

Chili

Hot chocolate

-

Praying for spring