All that I have to tolerate

pexels - pixabay

I am a highly sensitive person. I have always known that, but it took reading about in psychology articles to realize that it’s really a thing.

Because of that I have to tolerate things most people don’t seem to mind:

Noise

Chatter

Bright lights

Arguments

Fighting

Intense movies

Loud music

Constant motor sounds

Screens

Repetitive percussive sounds

Interruptions

Conflict

Any change in plans

 

Add to that the things I have to tolerate because my personality bends toward INFJ:

Lying

Fibbing

Personal Drama

Large gatherings

Noisy animals

Boasting/Preening/Pretending you are someone you are not

Ignoring of facts

Performing (without benefit of a stage)

 

I realize this is negative, but the only way I have been able to tolerate the things that bother me (and many times they bother me deeply) is God.

God has given me strength to raise children, discipline, teach in the classroom, give workshops, be a reporter for the newspaper, be an editor for the newspaper, organize and attend book signings, head clubs and gatherings, have lots of people over for a graduation or birthday party, be a cashier, attend family reunions, weddings, funerals …

God is amazing. No matter what our weaknesses are, He is there to help us through whatever needs to be done.

Thank you, God.

“And He has said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

 

Read more thoughts on the word Tolerate.

 

Then take a minute to check out my novel, The Porch.

 

_RHTM_

 

 

Lonely

 

 

I’ve been lonely all my life. I only recently discovered why.

I would hug the loneliness to myself and write and listen to music and sit outside and listen to birds and swim in the pool creating stories and imagining where I would end up after I grew up.

Emotionally

My emotions raged, and not just when I was going through the teens. My parents fought so it’s no wonder my brother and I played that out as we looked for treasure throughout the neighborhood. I was lonely for someone to play with who didn’t tell me I was weird. I was lonely.

Psychologically

I felt different from everyone. It seemed like they were all “them” and I was me, in a corner, happy, but not fitting in. I didn’t really like what they liked or talked about what they talked about. I didn’t even like to wear the same clothes (even though my mom forced me to).

In my 40s I took a test and found out I was an INFJ and that all the things I was experiencing were normal. I was normal. Lonely was normal.

Spiritually

I was raised to be extroverted and a leader. I was expected to do tremendous amounts of responsibilities and to excel. This led to sickness, headaches and anxiety. When I learned more about myself, I found that it was normal for extroverts to expect extroverted behavior from others. Once I embraced my introverted self and being who I really was I stopped being so angry, so judgmental, so In-Your-Face about everything. I began to relax and become comfortable with not living up to expectations, disappointing people, and following my own path.

And God was there showing me I felt lonely, not for other INFJs so much as lonely for My Home, the one the Father intended for me, the one Jesus is preparing for me. I was lonely for His rest.

I was lonely for other heaven bound creatures like me, others who found reading the Bible to be a daily adventure and supremely comforting, others who praised God in their pain and prayed for others and worked behind the scenes.

 

Thank You, God for the journey. Thank You for healing me. Thank You for giving me jobs that fit while being challenged to occasionally step out of my comfort zone.

 

Are you lonely? It’s okay.

In heaven that goes away.

 

If you like to write, join us at the Five Minute Friday family. You can post on Facebook, or you can post from your blog. You can even write with us and not share a single word.

 

_RHTM_

If you like what you are reading, please follow me >>>

Pretty soon I will be announcing the publication of my newest book of prayer meditations, Before Tea, God.