And it is just as hard today as it was then.
I find myself reeling from thousands of people telling me
how I should be, what I should think, what I should wear for my age, what I
should eat to be healthier/happier/live longer … and my craft suffers from all
the advice I see … and once I read it, I can’t UnRead it … I wish I could …
I wish I could un-remember things, un-think them, un-do the
stupid mistakes (like paying for things I thought would further my career and
make me happy) …
Why do I continually fall for it?
I think Hamlet went through the same thing. He was supposed
to be king, after all, so he had a lot of pressure to be like his dad, or his
grandfather, or other famous kings that he learned about …
But he just wanted to BE.
Hamlet only had a handful of people giving him their opinion
of what he should do, who he should be. Today I have thousands, millions even …
and daily I give them permission to pull me away from the plans I had already
made for the day and move toward the plans they think I should have.
I need Brain Independence.
Daily I need to write down my priorities, save them, post
them all over the house and ground myself and my day in them.
Daily I need to say no to media, Facebook, Instagram, Google
news, articles that catch my interest (but never deliver what they promise).
I haven’t found the perfect balance of my priorities and others’
ideas. Maybe I need a media fast. Maybe I should shut out the world and focus
on my responsibilities as they stand right now. Perhaps I need to build an
imaginary wall that includes a gate that is locked. I unlock that gate for
family and friends. I unlock that gate at specific times each day … or each
week … or each month …
Maybe, even though I have been working hard to protect my
own inner self, I am still a people pleaser and perhaps will always be. Knowing
that, I might be able to catch myself when I feel the draw, the desire, the joy
at the New Bright Shiny.
Maybe it’s still about self-discipline.
Hmmm… Your thoughts, Holmes?
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FMF Writing Prompt Link-up :: Be - Five Minute Friday
Yes, we need to be true to ourselves - the version of ourselves that God sees in us and not the false version imposed upon us by the world around us!
ReplyDeleteJust stopped by from FMF #12
Amen! Thanks for visiting ... and encouraging! Blessings!
DeleteI need to be true to me,
ReplyDeleteblow off all the digi-spam,
but it's got really hard to see
just exactly who I am.
I write these poems mostly for fun,
and sometimes to encourage, too,
but the thoughts sometimes do run,
"Does this stuff appeal to you?"
I have not a writer's bent,
nor philosopher welt-schmertz,
and even with the best intent,
I can't go and bare my hurts
'cause when I take them off the shelf,
I see them vain, laugh at myself.
exactly ... a writer friend of mine once said in a writing group meeting, when we share our writing we are actually children saying, "Tell me I'm good." Blessings on your day!
DeleteI hear you, and can relate to so much of it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing.